This year

Well, this year is wrapping up to an end faster than I can wrap my presents. I have realized that even though everything seems to stay the same day by day, there will be a time that you look back, and everything has changed. There has been a lot of changes in the past year...day by day. I have started a new school...from TJC to UT Tyler, now from UT Tyler to Portland State University...GO VIKINGS! lol...if I get accepted.



We started this year riding our dirtbikes every weekend with a group of really good guys...to losing one to a dirtbike accident. He was the glue that held us together, pushed me in my faith, taught me a lot about riding and not to be a chicken in anything I did. He didn't listen to my excuses, he normally called me out, and I still do not believe he is gone. By losing him, I also learned to pick up the phone when I think of someone and call them then instead of saying, "Oh later". You see, Butch called me on the Thursday before he passed, but I was "too busy" to answer (which was something I never did because I always had time for Butch-daddy), little did I know, that would have been the last time I would have talked to him. He was 64 and out rode and out lived us all. He raced his whole life and at 64 was still running over the younger competition. That reminds me when I hear a lot of people say they don't want to start school or fulfill their life dreams because they are too old, Butch wasn't too old to get back on his bike after 10 years of not riding and was showing everyone that Butch Lawrason was back. RIP Butch.



On the other hand, Jagger was tested for the academy. He is in a magnet school now and will test again in January. This reminds me of just the opposite of what Butch taught me...that no matter how young you are, it is never too soon to start your future. If you don't do it now, then you will soon become one of the people that say they can't because life passed them by. Should have, would have, could have. If you fail, don't stress, but keep working. Your purpose will reveal itself in ways you never expected. If you say nothing, do nothing, then you will be nothing. Challenge yourself to go 2 steps farther than you planned even when life knocks you back 4 steps.

In all of this, I have noticed that I stress too much on the little things. Stressing on the little things keeps you from accomplishing the bigger ones. When I realized that I needed to leave my current university, I realized that I didn't know what to do or where to go, but after a month of doing nothing, then a month of freaking out.....I remembered God is good and even if I can't get in this semester to PSU, I have some other classes I can take until my application process is complete. Plus, there is something bigger than me working right now and I just have to relax and let it happen, but not get lazy or too comfortable because as quickly as it was answered, it can be changed. God has it planned out but I do not know when or how the changes will come. All I can do is sit back and enjoy the ride.

I noticed that when I think life is going poorly it is that the bad things that keep me humble. A lot of people ask God "God, show me my purpose in life...." but they soon follow that up with "...but only if it fits into this life I want, or as long as it fits in with the education I think I needed." Stop asking for God to work out your plans, but be open to ALL of his plans. Even when I finish my degree in Criminal Justice / Spanish and go into something unrelated, there was something I learned, or someone I met along the way that is going to mold what I do for someone else. There is someone out there that needs you and we have to stop trying to force our agendas. WHOA let me get off this soap box and finish studing for my test! I feel like I am starting to ramble a bit.